PASSAGES

I don't mean savages, Indians or any other stereotype person one sees in stupid movies where natives are mindless boobs with spears and no clothes except a loin cloth. Those type of natives don't even exist in good old 'whitebread' ville where I am mayor that is called Mediocrity.

When I speak of natives, I'm speaking of the poor unfortunate souls who were cursed to be born in my city and have lacked the guts or ambition to find a real life somewhere else. Yeah, I include myself in that category.

Unlike the other natives though, I prefer to deal with my lack of guts, drive and all that other important stuff in a more wholesome way. Well, maybe wholesome is not the right word here. More like uplifting and positive. So wholesome in the sense that I feel it fulfilled in a good way.

The way I feel there is just not value in pretending on this issue that you can make morality the centerpiece. I'm sorry, but when you are totally deprived, even if it is your own fault, you are still going to need some form of satisfaction.

Which is why I figure I might as well get down and find that type of real solution that would make this truly a means to eliminating the restless feeling. I'm talking about distraction in a big time manner. None of this large coke and fast food options.

I'll pass on that for a restless need. However, it does seem to be the method of choice from some. Which if choking down a bunch of calories works for you, great.

But to be perfectly honest, I don't see where it really cures the restless state from what I have seen. Oh people like to claim so, but it doesn't impress me.

Which is made even more obvious from my point of view when I see how people react to a lack of satisfaction in terms of taking care of the restless problem. You can feel the tension literally radiating off their bodies.

And typically, like some guy with a broken leg who doesn't want to admit it, the person says, "I'm fine." I might believe them too if they weren't looking at the bumper of their car and wanting to bite it out of frustration.

However, I do let them stew in their dementia and denial. Every once and a while, they manage to get so desperate that good old Uncle Rash accommodates their restless needs.

That is providing it is a young restless lady. For the guys, I normally give them a few numbers were they can find some cure for their restless needs.

Naturally, I do keep track of such help. Never hurts to keep it as a detail to bring up in case the person doesn't cooperate down the road in one of my fiscal escapades. Yeah I know there is another name for it, but I prefer commission for aid with restlessness.