BELIEVE IT

Oh yeah, if your Uncle Rash tells you then you know it is true. Yes you can as they say, take it to the bank, sleep happy and secure and know all is well.

Okay, doesn't that make you feel better? Can't you just do the happy dance in the process? Come on move those tootsie. I know you want too.

Yeah, I know it is silly. But isn't life silly in general? Well I think it is and those who act like it is otherwise have a very serious problem in my point of view.

As a mayor I have to associate with all kinds of groups. It doesn't matter if I like them, I have to tolerate them for the sake of my office. And the votes of course.

So it means you know that I have to spend time with people who tell lies in order to make it seem like their little world and their little qualities are somehow godlike. I do my best to smile and listen, but frankly it is most of the time a load of crock.

But what am I suppose to do? Honestly these people are so pathetic. They revel in some small contrived award that really means nothing in reality. It just for show.

I wouldn't even mind that fact if they did it for fun, but they make it sound like it is the Congressional Medal of Honor. Yeah, they are that ridiculous about it.

However, you can forget them stopping no matter how stupid they are about such things. It gives them some stupid pleasure to make up such crap.

What really cracks me up even more is how they will in turn rag on some other group for doing the same thing. Like this is a good thing? Makes them feel better I guess.

So I suppose that I can cope with them boring me with showing off some autographed picture from celebrity that they managed to get somewhere and tell me they have met the person. Which gets really silly when it is a photo of somebody they claim to have met last year and who died years ago. Yeah, stupid isn't it?

You try listening to that crap with a straight face? Go ahead I dare you. I do manage. It is hard too. Darn hard believe me.

So the next time you think your life sucks, just do me a favor and try to picture yourself being me. I'm talking about sitting in some room full of thrift shop furniture somebody claims are antiques and who sits in a worn out suit with this hat made from a stuffed skunk and tries to tell you it is a prize.

See that ought to make you smile. Hope so. One of us should enjoy the moment. As for me, well as long as there is enough booze I always get by. At least my bartender enjoys the business. And with the number of these stupid groups around, trust me he is really getting rich.