THE PERILS OF PLOTS

Getting busted can be such pain. And if you are guilty, doubly so. Which is why I'm always so particular about making sure that I have a patsy to take the fall if something goes wrong.

That can be tricky though. I mean you have to be sure the patsy doesn't know he or she is a patsy. You have to actually sit down and pretend to like the person too. That can really be the hard part. I mean some patsy are not that likeable. Which is why they are patsies.

Once you get passed that part then it is just a matter of lying convincingly till you get them framed for your greed. That's why I try not to get to know such helpers to well. No sense of feeling guilty over having sold them down the river.

You just have to be able to maintain that right balance of showing interest without really caring. That can be a real challenge to be sure.

I do manage though. I am proud of that fact. And at times when things can't be dealt with adequately by the patsy safeguard then it is time for let's make a deal.

That is where I dig out my bribe card and pick the people I need to bribe to be sure there isn't any trouble. This is primarily a major back up plan.

Something I definitely do whenever I worry about the patsy screwing up before I need them to actually screw up. There are occasions where I misjudge somebody.

It can be tough when working with morons to always gauge how stupid they really are. There are times when it is, jeez, this guy is impossible.

I mean even with stupidity you expect a certain standard of dumbness. Not you know like blithering idiot level, but somebody who can walk and talk at the same time.

There are times regrettably when you get that first impression and decide a given patsy falls in one category and then they shock you. I mean big time.

Normally the shock is that they end up being dumber than your first assume. Rarely does it work the other way that they turn out to be smarter.

I wish that was the case to be honest. But then that would create its own problems. Because if they were smarter they would end up possibly figuring out your plans. And then you could have to worry about them demanding some kickback in order to not turn you in.

Alas the perils of planning such joyful enterprises. It can always be such a surprise. Such a wonderful adventure into the ways of hope I didn't forget something that will make up leaving me feeling like crap. Nobody who works to lie, cheat and steal like I do really doesn't need any help feeling that way.