OUTSTANDING

Outstanding can be a good thing. It ought to mean something truly extraordinary that stands out because of its uniqueness.

Where this gets sort of muddle in my opinion is when you are talking about extraordinary in a realm where things are, well, shall we say pathetic. When you get bland and dull as your standard then average can end up in that arena seeming like extraordinary.

Of course if such individuals or whatever find themselves in the real world with real outstanding people the whole illusion gets shattered. But as long as you don't venture beyond a given arena you're safe.

So I have learned over the years to sort of tone down my definition of outstanding when it applies to my city. Shoot, there are times when I have had to restrict it to someone that was able to function without drooling.

Naturally, I have sort of felt the need to avoid applying the term normal or sane to any relevant definition of outstanding in my city. Shoot, I don't even allow functional to be a factor in some cases.

And as long as the people I'm dealing with manage to take vacations and go somewhere other than a big city they generally avoid the risk of seeing what outstanding it really like. That can be a real blessing, let me tell you.

What sort of strains my brain is the times we end up having things like employee of the month or year. The winner often wins not because they are outstanding, but they screwed up less than anyone else.

I hardly consider that to be a source of pride, but let me tell you the people who work for me who win the trophies or certificate sure feel proud about them. I just do my best not to laugh to loud when they show them to me.

About the only time I really get concerned I guess is when I have to content with visitors to our city. It is rare that someone frequents our city for vacation, but it does happen.

And when it does you really have to work hard to make sure they don't do anything to upset the fragile balance of myth and incompetence that exists. That can happen if you manage to point out some gap in our logic.

So I do my best to isolate such people from our city workers. If I hear they are in our city I immediately send them discounts for various places to be sure they don't come to city hall.

I consider that to be an investment. When you spend all your time living in a balloon of myth the last thing you need in somebody coming around with a pin of reason to burst you fantasy.