HAVING A CLEAR CONSCIENCE

Oh yeah this is great. Someday I even hope to achieve it. But up to this point the closest I have come is to manage to either live in denial or simple be honest and accept when it comes to some issues I’ll never improve.

At least for the most part I do find ways to get by with the guilt. I’ve even taken up the habit of making a nice list of excuses I can use to justify all my bad behavior. Not that I let anyone look at it. I sure don’t want to risk somebody approaching it logically and pointing out the flaws in my thinking. That is never fun.

I also have managed a nice portfolio of lies. What is the difference between the two? Well for me, an excuse is something I tell myself in order to avoid a sense of guilt. It sounds great. Lies are what I tell other people. Those I know are bogus and since I know they are lies I don’t even worry about them being factual at all.

The trick on that part is to be sure I say something, which can’t be verified by the other person. Keeping it vague helps on that part as do generalities. However the big gun in deception is being able to find somebody else to blame for the whole thing. It is wonderful how if you give somebody a reason to hate somebody else they stop thinking about why they hate you!

Somewhere in the middle of that though I never actually achieve a point of having a clear conscience. All I manage is to reach a point where I’m too drunk or tired to thing of what makes me feel guilty.

I wish I had a way to say write down my helpful techniques for the benefit of others who are engaged in the wonderful and exciting world of lying for a living. I’m sure it could be an invaluable aid to politicians and used car salesman everywhere.

However I have a feeling that probably won’t happen any time soon. I might honestly take a stab at it, providing I can come up with the right kind of alias. I sure wouldn’t want to use my name. Otherwise the people I’ve been lying to might read it. That would definitely not be a good idea.

It is a shame sometimes how such wisdom can be a double-edged sword. On the one hand it helps me to survive. Only I can’t turn it into a book deal without ruining the benefit I get from using the information.

Until I work out that detail I guess I won’t have a chance to do otherwise than lie, buy and sigh. That is lie to others, buy my own excuses and sigh about dreams of how rich I could be if I knew a way to sucker enough people into paying me to learn my techniques.

Still I will keep dreaming. I even think I could come up with my own breakfast cereal for the event. Stash from Rash sounds good. No nutritional value of course, but I would list the names of vitamins on the box so you could pretend you were eating healthy.