SPECIALS

Would it be considered terrible silly of me to plan my own special tribute? I mean who knows me better than me?

And the one thing I know if I planned it I would have to complain about the way it turned out. I could even write my own speeches for them to give about me to be sure they didn’t leave out any details.

I appreciate how some might think this silly or self-absorbed, but what got me to thinking about this was the number of times I have known when this type of “specials” were really a farce. It is sort of like eulogies at funerals. The deceased might have been the biggest jerk in history, but he’ll seem like a saint according to the eulogy.

I guess what I’m saying it that if we are going to do these things and pretend they are serious when in reality they are a joke, then how come we can’t just have fun with them. You know put on paper hats, order a stripper and er, well maybe that is taking a tribute a tad too far.

I realize that they do have such things as “roasts” but those are intended for laughs and everyone knows it. What I’m talking about is having the serious kind of tribute where you can know up front that it really is only suppose to look like it is serious.

You might ask, what even bother? And that is in part my whole point. How come we insist up going through such games and not admitting it is a game? Wouldn’t it simply be a lot more fun if you did it where you could strive for making it just plain fun?

Having expressed my zeal therefore to let fly the uplifting creativity of self awareness, um translation, “me first imagination,” I’m going to explore this more fully in terms of my own situation. Perhaps I’ll give myself a testimonial dinner. I’ll write my own speech and give it. Even bestow upon myself a special I love Rash trophy.

And I’ll charge people to show up. Now don’t sneer when I say that. I’ll sell tickets under the guise of come and see just how big an ego I really have. Plus I’ll arrange for the meal. I will have none of this stupid tribute dinner meals that taste like cardboard. I’ll go first class.

The next day perhaps I’ll even have the special I love Rash parade with me as Grand Marshal by a vote of me. Yep that ought to do it.

Well if you are sitting there and shaking your head and saying God this guy is unbelievably ridiculous. Then you just demonstrated my point for me.

See if I was to do that for real, people would bitch. They would call it for what it is, utterly selfish and bogus.

But I simply ask you is it honestly better when they pull this crap and try to pretend it is legitimate? I don’t think so, but go ahead and keep being impressed when you see it happening and don’t want to accept it is window dressing. As for me, all I want is to have it be called entertainment for a change. Okay clown suits instead of tuxedoes would help too, but I won’t push that part.