PASSING THE FINGERS

Ah the glory of the moment when you have someone toss in their hand to help with a problem. Now that might not seem like a big deal, but with some of my situations it is really important.

That's because naturally I'm involved in things at times, which are not always legal. What can I say? Honestly, I got expenses and well, I must confess I enjoy it too.

So for those situations where you can exactly ask for volunteers it is wonderful to find a hand or two that will help deal with the problems. That is the part that probably bothers me the most.

In the movies they seem to make it appear as if they bad guys never have any problems besides getting caught. Which I wish was the only problem I had to deal with.

Let me tell you when you are dealing with people who don't have any morals, trust is not high on the agenda of things you can count on. Not even on the list frankly.

So I have to balance bribes with the degree of cooperation I can expect in the process. Which can be tricky that's for sure.

The best times is when I get someone involved who has as much to risk as I do if things don't work out. The ideal would be another politician in my city.

Unfortunately, for me the main option for such situations is a guy named Lance Allworthy and he is the epitome of a do-gooder. So you can forget asking him to do anything shady. That guy probably would just mess it up by accident. Which is not help I need.

Outside of him the rest of the clowns on our city council and my Vice Mayor are frankly not worth wasting time with. They are lucky to even remember what time of day it is, let alone think it terms of graft.

In fact with those guys, they would probably get aroused by the idea of left over pizza. Yeah, they are that pathetic. Naturally, that kind of help is no help.

Which leaves me basically on most things to deal with the businessmen. Well there are the occasions when police chief has lent a hand, but obvious he is limited to his participation. And I am fortunate that we have at least on cult in town who is practical in that regard.

So that give me a little variety. But for the usual day-to-day routine I have to deal with businessmen. And naturally we do make allowances for double-checking to see that we aren't missing anything in the process.

It is all fun when it works right. If it doesn't then well, at least Hugo gives me a break on the columns he writes so I don't have to look like an idiot.