THE FUN MOAN

Now that is something worth remembering. It is that fabulous time when you get to smile and let out a moan of pure satisfaction. This is that tine when you truly have reason to savor somebody getting what they deserve. I'm talking revenge naturally.

The problem is that people don't often admire when you gloat over revenge. Getting even is a good thing, but you aren't expected to do the victory dance and get nutso silly about it.

So we end up trying not to look like jerks by acting humble or a tad remorseful when our worst enemy bites the dust. Otherwise somebody will conclude we are a first class jerk. That is definitely not a good thing when you are a running for office and have to look like a decent human being.

It is all a game naturally. Nobody truly for one second is that noble, kind or compassionate. True, there are exceptions. They make me sick. Such people are a danger to society. I would hate to imagine if we were suddenly overpopulated with decent, caring people. God it would be awful if everyone went around being nice all the time.

I'm grateful that never happens. And I think when you look at things like our forms of entertainment such as movies I don't get the impression anyone is warming up to the idea of making that their goal in life.

So instead we restrain the truth of our nature from doing more than being a muffled sound of victory. One little moan that is shouting on the inside, hey the rat got what he deserved!

In my case, I often try to avoid being anywhere I can be seen when I'm inclined to moan. I mean it is so hard to restrain the need to shout and act totally happy that some jerk got what he deserved.

But in the event I do happen to hear about some enemy getting caught in a disaster and I'm out in public, well there is always the bathroom option. You just sneak off to the bathroom, hide in a stall, flush the toilet and hold your hand over your mouth. It is childish perhaps, but so is life when you think about it.

At least that is one of my many ways to cope with the joys of such situations. There are other, more infantile methods such as sending the poor suffering slob a telegram anonymously to congratulate him on getting zapped. And you really make it worst by sticking him with the fee.

Ah, the memories that brings back to me. I'm nearly brought to tears over the shear joy of that wonderful reflection. Pity I can share the joy with more people. But then I would have to risk my public image of being a nice guy. And that would be simply such a pain to fix with too many lies.