TELL ME ONE MORE TIME

Ah the things that are worth repeating. You hear them once and they sound so utterly incredible you have to hear them a second time.

Sometimes the shock to the system when you think what you are hearing is absolute bull makes you think you heard it wrong. So you ask the person to tell you again because you can't believe they think you are stupid enough to believe such crap.

Of course none of that in any way do I apply to myself you understand. Nope, I expect people to believe everything I say, no matter how unbelievably stupid it is.

Yes I know that's being a hypocrite and my response to that criticism is so what? That's right I said so what?

Frankly I have no problem whatsoever applying the rules to others that I don't apply to myself. How do I justify such a double standard? It is easy. In my opinion it is my duty as a leader to see that people adhere to a certain code of conduct and behavior. However, that is my job. I do it because I have to.

That doesn't mean I always enjoy it. Although normally if I heap a little misery on others you can be darn sure I do get a thrill from it at times.

Meanwhile I do find it necessary to my own life to live my personal convictions, which says I have the right to be a rebel if I want. And you can be darn sure I feel the sadness over the times I have to live those convictions, yet have also learned to cope with any guilt associated with my hypocrisy.

I cope by simply doing my best not to think about it. Yep, denial is always such a great remedy for having to think too much about things.

And if that doesn't work as I would like then I simply make sure I spend a lot of lunches in some bar. Alcohol has so many wonderful uses when you have to tarry in the role of being guardian of the status quo while also trying to have some fun in the process.

Which of course brings me to the other aspect of this whole issue, namely how telling me one more time also applies to stuff you actually want to hear of a good nature. I love being told how great I am.

Now if I could only figure out a way to get somebody I know to tell me that and not some girl I pay on those 900 numbers to do it. It just would seem that it would man more if I heard if from a friend or even a family member.

But then I guess that doesn't happen considering how well they really know me. I sure wish that didn't get people to know the truth. Having things repeated is so much more satisfying when they only believe the crap you peddle and not the facts. Those I seldom want to hear more than once.