YOU DID WHAT?

I would consider my life truly blessed if I never had to ask this question again. But lucky me, the gods or fate or just some drunken pissed off gnomes have other plans.

Perhaps there is some place in the world where people never get a case of the stupids. I haven't found it yet, but I keep hoping.

However, I imagine that will my luck I would end up somehow causing an infection of moronic propositions till nobody there could function without being utterly absurd. Yeah, I bet that would be my misfortune.

So in reflection perhaps being stuck in this realm where my employees only go brain dead is a good thing. It might be better if they never called me to tell me about it, but I doubt that will ever happen.

Essentially, anyone can have a bad day. Perhaps some it equates to a bad life. One they managed to get out of bed on the wrong side of their brain. It happens. Way to often I suppose.

And naturally I have managed lots of practice at maintaining my poker face while screaming on the inside when one of my employees starts out a conversation with, "Um boss...." It is almost always followed by "you're not going to believer this, but...."

I have always learned to believe it. I hardly have a choice. I just wish they would appreciate that after they start out a conversation that way enough times I sort of know what is coming next. I do try not to yawn though.

Basically, I do wish though that they could spare me the awkwardness of their rambling. It is like they need to tell me their life's story so I will understand they have a valid reason for going brain dead. Frankly, I could care less.

All I want to know is what did you screw up and how bad did you goof? Is this like a major alarm fire or just smoke signals? Do I have to call all the fire trucks to save the city from burning to the ground or can I just admire the smoke?

I don't think you can blame me for having that attitude. After all, if I'm going to play fireman because somebody keeps playing with matches and burning their fingers, I would appreciate it if they would at least try to learn from the blunder. You know, like if you got burnt fingers once then have the smarts to not do the same stupid thing again.

For me it is a matter of growing weary from having to think up new lies to explain the same old stupid mistakes. That just gets so tiring after a while. Plus the public just won't buy all the baloney I peddle on a given blunder if I have to explain how it will never happen again and have had to do it more than six or seven times. Even the apathetic do have a tolerance level to their apathy. True, in Mediocrity it is probably a lot more than in some cities, but they still can only take so much of stupidity no matter how creative my lie.