GIVE US THIS DAY

I’ve heard this too many times in relationship to the bible thumper crowd. They don’t play fair though. They always involve God. So you end up saying something about give us this day, but it is whatever the man upstairs decides is cool.

I guess it would be rather tacky to wish for something like “give us this day, a million bucks.” Or maybe you know something like “give us this day, the phone number of that cute chick I saw in the red convertible that passed me on the freeway.” Yeah you can bet you’ll never hear those kinds of give us this day from any bible thumper. I didn’t say they wouldn’t be thinking it, just that they are not going to say it!

But for the rest of us is it really bad to have such wishes? I mean I’m sure we think of them all the time so what’s wrong with saying so. Only when does that happen?

The one thing that isn’t going to happen is that it will be mentioned in some prayer. You can be sure if you think God is listening you aren’t going to wish for what you really want that might risk thunderbolts frying your underwear. Come on, let’s be honest about it, that is sort of the reason right?

Which is okay I guess. I suppose there is nothing wrong with pretending we have morals. Even if we never practice them. Not sure what the real benefit is, but I guess it helps to allow us to avoid admitting we are the creeps we really are!

Hmmm, now there is an idea. We could say a prayer to give us this day honesty. God is in favor of that right?

Although you do have to wonder if this would be a good idea. I mean can you imagine what would happen if people like me had to actually tell the truth? It could be a real disaster.

Gee, I wonder if just wishing to have God sort of look the other way for a while or maybe go off and spend time with some other universe would be a bad thing. It just seems like if we knew he was busy and not watching we could be more honest on our own and not have to add lying to our other terrible problems that give us those nasty bouts of guilt.

I reckon that isn’t going to happen. I suppose when you are talking about a supreme being who doesn’t have to take naps and is everywhere all the time it is a bit too much to expect for him to take a vacation. Plus I imagine he enjoys his work so that would complicate it too.

So in the meantime I reckon I’m stuck just mentioning the give us this day thing only at some breakfast where it is expected. And hopefully I don’t screw up and accidentally mention something embarrassing about the hot looking woman who is serving the food. That never leads to the kind of dessert I prefer. At least not as long as anyone, but who I want happens to hear it.

Here’s hoping you don’t have that problem either. And that maybe your give us this day is one you don’t have to lie about.