ONE HAND WASHES THE OTHER CREEP

Ever have to cope with the “me first” barter people? Those are the ones that generally thing they are the most loving and giving people on the planet, but are in reality hateful, greedy rats. Why is it they also seem most of the time to be bible thumpers too or peddlers of some form of God they claim is truth.

I not trying to bash the bible thumpers so much, just the ones that try to use God as excuse for their incredible evil. And that seems to start so often with them doing what they call “good deeds.” The only problem is that whether they are good deeds it becomes obvious way too fast that they were only motivate by some ulterior motive.

Basically doing it in expectancy of getting something in return. The most annoying aspect for me is that they don’t just hope for something back, they practically demand it! It is like if you don’t take the hint then you can be sure they’ll start shouting, “Hey pal, I did something for you now you better do even more for me.”

That is probably my biggest gripe. They are content if they say help you with some chore if you do a chore of likewise quality for them. What they expect is you do to a whole lot more than just the same. It becomes a kind of investment at that point.

I have tested this theory on several occasions and it has so far always proven true. How I test it is by doing nothing when they person offers to help. First of all I don’t ask for their help. I just sit back and let them offer.

Then after they do whatever and make sure they are on the cell phone bragging about it I merely say thank you. Now if they did it to truly help that ought to be enough.

And depending on the ulterior motive they will either leave and contact me later for a “favor” or will hang around and keep talking till I get the hint. Those are the ones that are really a pest.

Now depending on my mood I’ll either do something for them or I’ll promise to do it later, only never get around to it. Of course if I want something from them I will take the time to do something later for them after they have given up on expecting something from me. That is my way of priming the pump to get them to do something else for me. Yeah that sucks and I LOVE IT!

Of course in my case what can I say, being selfish and greedy is something I do all the time. I’m by nature a kind of guy who depends upon using people. I also have enough of a double standard to not want others to use me, especially if they are going to somehow blame god for their behavior.

So why not turn the whole thing into a game? That is what I do. And so far I like to feel the score is slanted in my favor. Since I make up the rules as I go along that helps. Even if it didn’t I would cheat. Why ruin the fun by doing something like playing fair. I leave that for the guy who wants it of others while not planning on doing it himself.