THE BIG LITTLE

In the wee hours of some night when inebriation makes the world look rosy and less hostile, this is one of the prevailing thoughts to dog my mine. It is the moment of false lucidity when I think the smallest detail is truly important.

I even got in one particularly stupid mood once and decide to compose a poem to chronicle this fabulous insight that several Scotches had inspired in regards to a wilting flower. Well I will not bore anyone by sharing that yawner of an insight. Needless to say in the morning it was nothing more than gibberish and I knew my high school English teacher was definitely a prophet in terms of her observations about my poetic efforts in her class.

Anyway, despite that set back by reality it doesn’t keep me from occasionally finding inspiration to see something insignificant as profound. I guess I’m a heart just a sucker for that kind of possibility. Call it a fondness for the underdog or just being a sap for supposed losers, but I do love those stories when the person who is touted as lacking potential or everyone predicts will always be a failure ends up a winner.

True, it doesn’t happen as often as I would like. But I have had a few occasions when I have tried to help make it a reality.

I just wish I was better at picking the proper situation in which to attempt such efforts. For some reason I always end up picking some person or cause where it really is little and no amount of lies will make it become big.

Still I haven’t given up on hoping I can achieve this lofty goal. I would really like just once to turn a misfit uncut stone of a person into some polished diamond of refined talent.

So I continue my quest to find that perfect candidate. Oh never do I work that hard at it. Just when it comes to mind. And if I see a flicker of potential in some ordinary person, the I start talking to them to see if the brain in their head is really connected to their lips.

Then if it is, does the brain have the kind of gray matter that can actually do more than make his or her bodily functions work. Plus does the person have the capacity to go beyond being whatever with the right help.

Like I said this to me is a quest. And taking all the proper steps of determining such possibility does improve the chances of success. However so far my search hasn’t been a successful as I had hope. I’ve come close a couple of times, but I have yet to as they say “close escrow” on such an investment.

I just know sooner or later I’m bound to have some kind of success though. At least I hope so. I mean how can I get rich writing a self-help book if I don’t have a testimony or two from some successful disciple? Sometimes I do wonder if selfishness is enough in terms of motives.