Looking Good

Oh I’m ready to skip to the sky with joy
now that I solve my problems of baldness,
got this super cool toupee,
only cost me $99.00 a month for a mere ten years
from that amazing chrome dome web site,
www.wild-piggy-wiggy-wiggle-giggle.com.

Heck, why worry about my head
since I can always wear a hat,
shoot they even give you one for free
after it was no longer needed
by that patient at the rest home,
may he rest in peace.

Can’t wait to strut my new strand over at the mall,
hope it works like the promise
to make all that gals swoon.

Sure has to be better than being chased
by all those dogs on the street,
I mean the hair does smell like meat
and the label says something about
Acme glue factory and slaughterhouse society.

Oh well, who cares,
never look this good before,
makes me all ready for my blind date,
Ethel is a real hottie from her picture,
can’t wait to see what hair
she has underneath her hat,
wonder if it matches that green hair
on her chin and coming out of her ears?