My Five Items To Have On A Deserted Island

Agnabus Flagellation - An anorexic nun with a messianic complex who talks to an Angel, Seraphoogle with the help of her rosary bead.

 

Hespibah Wickerphelgm – A witch with a multi-personality disorder than has visions of brimstone hot fudge sundaes eaten by eye of newts.  She claims she can turn fudge into dragons who sky write profanity in Latin.

 

Edna Cramqueen – A woman who can read palms, but suffers from permanent PMS, thinks she is the reincarnation of Attila The Hun.  She can scream cuss words in seven different languages.

 

Melody Mayhemmistress – A psychotic fitness trainer who believes in astral cannibalism and vampire jazzersize.  She finds as long as she takes her meds that only she can see.

 

My other item: Six year supply of Diet Cherry Coke