Oh Deer Me

Yep, me and my buds

decided for the New Year

we would get some real mountain man

kind of fitness.

 

Going to tramp down those woods,

take our trusting rifles

(well the ones we would borrow)

and bring us home

some big buck just to say we could,

pass it around, well the head at least,

properly stuffed and mounted,

then be able to share our trophy,

exhaust our tongues telling tales

about our hunter prowess.

 

Course none of us had any real clue

on anything the slightest outdoors in skill,

barely found the forest,

never saw a single deer,

ended up sitting in some motel

soaking up beer and watching cable

while making up big lies to tell everyone.

 

Mercifully one of my pals

saw this deer head in this sport good’s store

that was located near the motel,

so we all chipped in to buy it

each getting our picture taken

then bringing it home

so we can take turns putting it on display.

 

Sure worked out mouths a lot,

waist lines never shrunk even got bigger,

but we held the deer head in front of us

in order to distract from our girth.