Remote Control Therapy

Poor Jennifer was in such a predicament

loved a cat and husband,

but thought she had it in balanced,

until she started watching those talk shows

all those therapists who treated

every fractured mind and dysfunctional life

that could be found on the planet.

 

Became persuaded under the sway

of the deluge in multimedia, metaphysical,

psycho-babble, past life regression,

phobia and childhood traumas,

none of which she even thought were her problem,

that her cat has issues over a kitten memories

to do with tuna and gold fish,

learned that from calling a psychic on one show,

then that her husband

most likely suffered from suppressed desires

related to his passive, aggressive

introverted, claustrophobia inclinations.

 

It made her head spin just to imagine

how each gesture either pet or spouse made

was possibly some hint of a “Freudian” slip.

 

Finding happiness in the acceptance

her life needed change,

convinced once she got a home for both

her tabby and mate

things would get perfect.

 

(Hopefully it will give her peace

before the effects of that latest talk show shrink,

who talked about toilets causing insomnia and paranoia,

gets her to have no choice,

but to replace her john with an outhouse.)