Please pass the pudding, Ted is dead

Oh how the Christmas season showed
each year at our office party,
what bounty they did host,
that we might all feel so merry
and find some sweet release from stress.

Only things went a tad off center this time,
was that sidedish of broccoli and cauliflower
swimming in some sauce,
it tasted different,
but only had a small amount,
unlike that health nut, Ted,
who prided himself on not being a drinker.

How he gobbled down most of that offering,
and then ended up slowly starting to slur his words,
then I notice other foods also covered in the same sauce.

Wasn’t long before things got crazy,
people staggering around,
rambling the strangest things,
one secretary rambling
about how spandex
had cause her to get a divorce
because her husband fell in love
with a gal at his gym
wearing a pair in pink.

Meanwhile one of the bosses
suddenly decided he was an artist
using napkins
to make sketches
that he claim were an elephant
dancing and holding a tuba,
but looked more like the devil.

In the middle of this insanity
I noticed the caterer looked like a hippie
and finally sort out that his idea of seasoning
was to add drugs to what he cooked,
(the price we paid for trying to go cheap on cost.)

Asking someone hand me the chocolate pudding,
which I knew was from a can,
watching Ted passed out on the floor,
wondering if a picture would work as blackmail
to help replace bonus I didn’t get.